Maxine

Love that Maxine!

Dust

I think this says it all!

Proven Medical Test

How to tell if your feet stink!

Is It Just Me?

I changed my mind. It's a woman's prerogative, you know. I had posted something about just getting into the weekend and then realizing that tomorrow is Monday when something caught my attention on the News. Now, correct me if I'm wrong here... but I just don't get this Kwame Kilpatrick thing. I realize that Clinton did it.... but come on! Detroit is having a hard enough time without this. I know I shouldn't post something so political, but to me it isn't political. It's a matter of ethics. And there doesn't appear to be any here.

Snow

As I am sitting here reading through my emails, I happened to look up. Outside my window a beautiful, big-flaked, gentle snow is falling. It is so pretty! It kind of puts a "muffler" on the noise of everyday life.

and....

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Michigan.

Don't Mess With Old Ladies!

Compliments of my friend, Carol.

Enjoy the laugh...

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Twice as Nice

Oh joy! Oh happy day! "Chuck" is not only new, it is on TWICE tonight! Wahoo!!!

A Little Laughter

Amazingly Simple Home Remedies

1. If you're choking on an ice cube, simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers ~ simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

8. Remember - everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

9. If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

DAILY THOUGHT: Some people are like Slinkies - not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

A Deep Sadness

I cannot fathom the depth of sorrow that a mother suffers in the loss of her son. I have a friend whose son, in his twenties, passed away in his sleep last night. He still lived at home. Needless to say, she is totally devastated. If you would keep her in your prayers, I would greatly appreciate it.

I have known him and his two sisters from the moment they were born. He was a very nice young man. Always took the time to say hello when he saw me. Would take time out of whatever it was he was doing to chat over the fence. He had even cut my lawn a time or two and even cleaned my sidewalk after a snow and wouldn't take anything for it. He had his problems. Most young people today do. But, he was good to his mother and loved his little niece (his youngest sister's little girl) and the newest nephew (his older sister's little boy). He loved classic cars. He liked to sit on the front porch and watch the world go by. He loved dogs. I will miss him.

Brooklyn Parrots

I visit a website called Brooklyn Parrots (http://www.brooklynparrots.com/).

I love those little birds. Please visit their site, if you are interested, to read about the issue in Yacolt.

There is cruelty going on with these lovely little birds in Yacolt, Washington. It is total cruelty and major uncaring by the big utility company there. I have posted a "Letter" below that will enable you to sign a REAL petition to try to stop their cruelty. After you visit the site and read you can sign the petition through that site or come back here and sign it through this one. It doesn't matter which way you choose just as long as you take a moment to sign. I copied this letter from a confirmation email I received from the Petition Online people. Thank you for your time.

Dear Friends,

I have just read and signed the online petition: "Stop Clark Public Utility's Killing of Monk Parakeets" hosted on the web by PetitionOnline.com, the free online petition service, at: http://www.PetitionOnline.com/YacoltOP/

I personally agree with what this petition says, and I think you might agree, too. If you can spare a moment, please take a look, and consider signing yourself.

Best wishes, Sandra McIntire

A Michigan Winter Story For You

WINTER BLONDE

As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says 'Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load.'

The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly, 'Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!'

Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker rolls down the window. Again she says 'Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!'

When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on her window, and after she lowers it, he says...

'Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter in Michigan and I'm driving the SALT TRUCK!'

Brrrrrrrrr

Man! Is it cold or what?! It is 13º with a -1º windchill..... and it's going to get COLDER! I am SO not into this.

Learning

I learned quite a lot today. I visited two places on the recommendation of a friend:

First, I visited here:
www.ecoranch.blogspot.com/

Then I visited here:
http://storyofstuff.com/

If you have about 20 minutes, the story of stuff is worth the watch. You will learn quite a bit, too.

Withdrawal

OK. I've had enough. Where do I write these striking writers? I want my programs back!!! ARGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

No Brains

I am so glad that I'm not famous. I mean, what is up with these "stars"? They run off to some tropical island, get married and then lo and behold.... they don't get along. The wedding wasn't really official. They screech like banshees in public (and everywhere else) and then announce several days later that they aren't GOING to make it legal because they can't stand each other. Puleeeeeeaaaaase! All that money and no brains. What a shame.

Really?

Are they serious? Milk on the shelves from cloned cows? Not me (at least I don't think I did)!

Funny

OK. I'm still not supposed to be sitting in this chair... but I got this from my nephew and thought it was hilarious!

Oh, the Pain...

I tell ya... there's nothing like a backache to make you feel old! I really shouldn't be sitting in this chair typing, but I just had to. The girls are not happy because I can't bend over to pet them... they both have a personal aversion to being next to each other most of the time and they have to do that in order to be "scritched" at the same time. Poor things. I don't mean to imply that they are spoiled or anything. The bad part is that I hurt so bad I couldn't even get dressed to go to work. While I love my jammies, I prefer to stay in them all day because I want to not because I have to. Sigh. Even worse, I didn't do anything to make it hurt! Hubby took me out to dinner (nothing fancy - just Old Country Buffet -- love their turkey) and when I sat down in the booth I felt a twinge. Went to bed thinking that it would be all better today -- man was I ever wrong about that one! Gosh it's hard to get older.....

Friends

I was thinking today about friends. Throughout my life I have had many. Sometimes you lose touch with the ones from younger days, and then through some miracle of miracles you find them again. It is wonderful. I have even found a couple of my friends from junior and senior high school through the magic of Classmates dot com. And, of course, there are the new ones you make along the way through life. Be it through work, church, your children... they are a wonderful part of that ever-expanding circle. Each one touches your life in a different way. And, if you're lucky, you will touch theirs in a positive way that will be remembered throughout their lifetime.

Friends -- they make my life so much richer. It's something that money will never be able to buy.

Carelessness

I am so sad. I read that 19 Bald Eagles died in Alaska. It was because of man's carelessness that they died. Disregard for double checking your work. Being in a hurry to do something else. It made me cry. Such majesty gone to waste.

Honored

I noticed something today. Something that made me feel 10 feet tall. Something I never imagined to see. I saw my blog link on some of my favorite blogs. I can't begin to tell you how that made me feel, but one word comes to mind -- honored.

Thank you. You've made my day!

Answers

One of my friends sent me one of those "getting to know you" emails where you tell your favorite food, movie, smell, etc. I always send them out and send my answers back to the one that sent it to me.

One of the questions was: "What is your favorite sound?"

My answer? My favorite sound is: The sound of my husband's key in the door in the evening.

Of course, the girls are thrilled, too! The other "parent" that spoils them is home! LOL

(You didn't think I was going to get all soppy and not throw in something to laugh at, did you?)

Profound Words

These words were at the bottom of an email I got today. Pretty profound (not to mention true).

"The irony of life is that by the time you're old enough to know your way around, you're not going anywhere!"

Sums it up pretty well, don't you think?

Television

I have several shows that I really like, but there is one in particular that really has caught my fancy. It is called "The Big Bang Theory" and it is written by the people who do Two and a Half Men (which I used to like, now, not so much).

Sheldon and Leonard are paired as perfectly as Laurel and Hardy, Martin and Lewis or Abbott and Costello. Penny is the perfect "Gracie" to those two. They never cease to make me laugh.

Another one that is very well written (or at least it seems to me that it is) is "Chuck". I love the take-off, or spoof, if you will, on Best Buy and the Geek Squad. Cracks me up.

Then, of course, there is "House". Love that one, too.

Much to my husband's dismay, I also like HGTV -- it's the woman's ESPN!

Well, I've got to run. Jeopardy is on!

A Wild Night...

My sister sent me this. I thought I would share.

A Wild Night At Our House!!

Another year has passed And we're all a little older.
Last summer felt hotter And winter seems much colder.
I rack my brain for happy thoughts, To put down on my pad,
But lots of things, That come to mind Just make me kind of sad.

There was a time not long ago When life was quite a blast.
Now I fully understand About ' Living in the Past'.
We used to go to friends homes, Football games and lunches.
Now we go to therapy, to hospitals, And after-funeral brunches.

We used to have hangovers, From parties that were gay.
Now we suffer body aches And sleep the night away.
We used to go out dining, And couldn't get our fill.
Now we ask for doggie bags, Come home and take a pill.

We used to often travel To places near and far.
Now we get backaches From riding in the car. . . .
Used to go out shopping For new clothing at the Mall
But, now we never bother... All the sizes are too small.

That, my friend is how life is, And now my tale is told.
So, enjoy each day and live it up... Before you're too darn old!!

Fog

I love fog (when I don't have to drive or walk in it). It's like a heavy snow -- it muffles sounds AND it slows down the flights (I live by Metro Airport). The squirrels must be happy - they've been running across the top of the house all morning!

Cold...

A friend of mine sent me this and I thought it was pretty clever!

Spring Fever

I start watching the snowball bush outside my window in early December. Know what I'm looking for? Buds. Yep. Buds. I look for the slightest hint of a bud on the snowball bush and the maple tree and oak tree. That kind of starts it. Then you most oftentimes get a January thaw.

When we get that, I'm done. Spring fever sets in.

I know. I know. It just turned winter. But I can't help it. I love spring, summer and fall. Winter, not so much.

What can I say? Can robins be far behind?

Squirreling It Away

Okay. I confess. I'm a pack rat -- big time! I have this little bitty house (900 sq. ft.) with no basement, no crawl space, no attic to speak of and NO garage. Sigh.

I've been here for 35 years and I have, in the last few years, become unable to throw anything away. What is up with that?!

I know I should chuck it or give it away, but I just can't.

Books -- I love books.... I save them. I'm pretty good at giving away the paperbacks, but I won't give away a hard cover. I keep stuff that I think I will use someday. (Of course, there have been times when being a pack rat has come in handy. The whole family appreciates me then!)

Working full time at my age makes me tired. I come home, look at the mail, save the important stuff and throw the junk (things I don't want in the trash) in a box to be shredded later..... a Copy Paper box..... it is full and the girls love to bat things out of it and play in it. All I want to do when I come in the door is feed the girls, get into my jammies, have a bite to eat and watch Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.

Sad, isn't it?

Hubby will say, "Do you want to go....?" and before he can finish the sentence I say, "Uh, jammies!" When I get home from work, I DON'T want to go anywhere!!!! If it can't be done on the way home from work, it ain't happening!

Maybe there is hope for me....

Trying Something New

I've added a "photo album" to the bottom. I think I'm going to get the hang of this!

Information Please

I got this from a friend in an email today and thought I would share.

When I was quite young, my father had one of the first telephones in our neighborhood. I remember the polished, old case fastened to the wall. The shiny receiver hung on the side of the box. I was too little to reach the telephone, but used to listen with fascination when my mother talked to it.

Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was "Information Please" and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone's number and the correct time.

My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my mother was visiting a neighbor. Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy.

I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone! Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the parlor and dragged it to the landing climbing up, I unhooked the receiver in the parlor and held it to my ear. "Information, please" I said into the mouthpiece just above my head.

A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear.

"Information."

"I hurt my finger..." I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough now that I had an audience.

"Isn't your mother home?" came the question.

"Nobody's home but me," I blubbered.

"Are you bleeding?" the voice asked.

"No," I replied. "I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts."

"Can you open the icebox?" she asked.

I said I could.

"Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger," said the voice.

After that, I called "Information Please" for everything. I asked her for help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my math. She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts.

Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died. I called, Information Please," and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown-ups say to soothe a child. But I was not consoled. I asked her, "Why is it that birds should sing so beautifully and bring joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?"

She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, "Wayne, always remember that there are other worlds to sing in."

Somehow I felt better.

Another day I was on the telephone, "Information Please."

"Information," said in the now familiar voice. "How do I spell fix?" I asked.

All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest. When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston. I missed my friend very much. "Information Please" belonged in that old wooden box back home and I somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me.

Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.

A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle.

I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown Operator and said, "Information Please."

Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well.

"Information."

I hadn't planned this, but I heard myself saying, "Could you please tell me how to spell fix?"

There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, "I guess your finger must have healed by now."

I laughed, "So it's really you," I said. "I wonder if you have any idea how much you meant to me during that time."

I wonder," she said, "if you know how much your call meant to me. I never had any children and I used to look forward to your calls."

I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister.

"Please do", she said. "Just ask for Sally."

Three months later I was back in Seattle. A different voice answered "Information." I asked for Sally.

"Are you a friend?" she said.

"Yes, a very old friend," I answered.

"I'm sorry to have to tell you this," she said. "Sally had been working part-time the last few years because she was sick. She died five weeks ago."

Before I could hang up she said, "Wait a minute, did you say your name was Wayne?" "Yes." I answered.

"Well, Sally left a message for you. She wrote it down in case you called. Let me read it to you."

The note said, "Tell him there are other worlds to sing in. He'll know what I mean."

I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant.

Never underestimate the impression you may make on others.

Whose life have you touched today?

Lifting you on eagle's wings. May you find the joy and peace you long for.

Life is a journey ... NOT a guided tour. So don't miss the ride and have a great time going around you don't get a second shot at it.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year to all! May the new year be filled with love, laughter, health, happiness and prosperity!