Sunday, August 31, 2008

Breaking News...

Wal-Mart stores across Alabama sold out of ammunition yesterday afternoon.

A reliable source reports that purchasers confirmed that while Russia may have invaded Georgia, they sure as h*ll ain't doin' it to Alabama!

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Worth 1,000 Words


Thanks, Poppi!

Friday, August 29, 2008

Smart?

A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.00. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan,so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Mercedes.

The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $250,000.00 Mercedes as collateral against a $5,000.00 loan. An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Mercedes into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000.00 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000.00?"

The blonde replies, "Where else in New York City can I park my Mercedes for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"

FINALLY, a Smart Blonde joke!

(Thanks, Michele!)

Thursday, August 28, 2008

I'm Getting Spoiled!


My friend Carol from http://charliandme.blogspot.com/ has given me another award! Isn't he cute?!
I am very happy to get such a great award. Comments can be a challenge because sometimes you want to say something and you look and there it is -- someone beat you to those words! Or you have help from gremlins when you leave a comment and don't see that they've helped you until you hit the button.... they've typed things like ktchen instead of kitchen or acme instead of came.... cheeky little things! LOL
Like my friend Carol said, "I feel like we have all become a great group of blogger pen pals in a sense and communication is the key. Since we can't pick up the phone, or stop by to see one another, the next best thing is to leave a comment. I try to leave them as often as I can and I really appreciate all of the comments every one leaves on my blog. Thank you so much. It's been so nice getting to know all of you, and all of you that do leave comments on blogs certainly deserve this award."
The rules are that I can only pick seven. So here goes:
Handsome Nate over at http://fargo1928.blogspot.com/
Blogger is starting to get on my nerves.... now I can't put a line between paragraphs!!! ARGGGG!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

36 Years Ago Today...

Happy Birthday, Sammy.
Love, Mom

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Interesting stuff...

Texas:
Did you know that there is only one natural lake in Texas? All the rest are man-made.

Alaska:
More than half of the coastline of the entire United States is in Alaska.

Amazon:
The Amazon rain forest produces more than 20 percent of theworld's oxygen supply. The Amazon River pushes so much water into the Atlantic Ocean that more than one hundred miles at sea, off the mouth of the river one can dip fresh water out of the ocean. The volume of water in the Amazon River is greater than the next eight largest rivers in the world combined and three times the flow of all rivers in the United States.

Antarctica:
Antarctica is the only land on our planet that is not owned by any country. 90% of the world's ice covers Antarctica. This ice also represents 70%of all the fresh water in the world. As strange as it sounds, Antarctica is essentially a desert. The average yearly precipitation is about two inches. Although covered with ice (all but 0.4 percent of it), Antarctica is the driest place on the planet, with an absolute humidity lower than the Gobi desert.

Brazil:
Brazil got its name from the nut, not the other way around.

Canada:
Canada has more lakes than the rest of the world combined. Canada is an Indian word meaning "Big Village."

Chicago:
Next to Warsaw, Chicago has the largest Polish population in the world.

Detroit:
Woodward Ave. in Detroit, Michigan, carries the designation M-1, because it was the first paved road anywhere.

Damascus:
Damascus, Syria, was flourishing a couple of thousand years before Rome was founded in 753 BC, making it the oldest continuously inhabited city in existence.

Istanbul:
Istanbul, Turkey is the only city in the world located on two continents.

New York City:
The term "The Big Apple" was coined by touring jazz musicians of the1930's who used the slang expression "apple" for any town or city. Therefore, to play New York City is to play the big time ~ The Big Apple. There are more Irish in New York City than in Dublin, Ireland, more Italians in New York City than in Rome, Italy, and more Jews in New York City than In Tel Aviv, Israel.

Wilderness:
Percentage of Africa that is wilderness 28%. Percentage of North America that is wilderness 38%.

Ohio:
There are no natural lakes in the state of Ohio, every one is man-made.

Rome:
The first city to reach a population of 1 million people was Rome, Italy in 133 B.C. There is a city called Rome on every continent.

Siberia:
Siberia contains more than 25 percent of the world's forests.

SMOM:
The smallest sovereign entity in the world is the Sovereign Military Order of Malta (SMOM). It is located in the city of Rome, Italy, has an area of two tennis courts, and as of 2001 has a population of 80, 20 fewer people than the Vatican. It is a sovereign entity under international law, as is the Vatican.

Sahara Desert:
In the Sahara Desert, there is a town named Tidikelt, which did not receive a drop of rain for ten years.

St. Paul:
St. Paul, Minnesota was originally called Pigs Eye after a man named Pierre Pig's Eye" Parrant who set up the first businessthere (bootlegging).

Roads:
Chances that a road is unpaved in the USA ~ 1 percent. Chances that a road is unpaved in Canada ~ 75 percent.

United States:
The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are meant to be usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.

Now you know a lot more than you knew two minutes ago! -- Thanks, Carol!

Monday, August 25, 2008

Something Cool!

My sister sent me this. It's a website where you can find out what the number one song was the year you were born. I think it's a pretty neat thing. Enjoy!

http://www.joshhosler.biz/NumberOneInHistory/SelectMonth.htm

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Saturday, August 23, 2008

The Silver Screw

Once upon a time, a young lad was born without a belly button. In its place, was a silver screw. All the doctors told his mother that there was nothing they could do. Like it or not, he was stuck with it..... he was screwed.

All the years of growing up was real tough on him, as all who saw the screw made fun of him. He avoided ever leaving his house... and thus, never made any friends.

One day, a mysterious stranger saw his belly and told him of a swami in Tibet who could get rid of the screw for him. He was thrilled. The next day, he took all of his life's savings and bought a ticket to Nepal.

After several days of climbing up steep cliffs, he came upon a giant monastery. The swami knew exactly why he had come. The screwy guy was told to sleep in the highest tower of the monastery.... and the following day when he awoke, the screw would have been removed.

The man immediately went to the room and fell asleep. During the night while he slept, a purple fog floated in an open window, bearing in its mist, a solid silver screwdriver In just moments, the screwdriver removed the screw and disappeared out the window.

The next morning when the man awoke, he saw the silver screw laying on the pillow next to him Reaching down, he felt his navel, and there was no screw there!

Jubilant, he leaped out of bed...... and his butt fell off.

The moral to this is:

'Don't screw around with things you don't understand........ you could lose your *ss.'

(Thanks, Frank!)

Friday, August 22, 2008

Train Ticket

Three women and three men are traveling by train to the football game. At the station, the three men each buy a ticket and watch as the three women buy just one ticket.

'How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket?' asks one of the men.

'Watch and learn,' answers one of the women.

They all board the train.

The three men take their respective seats but all three women cram into a toilet together and close the door. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door and says, 'Ticket, please.' The door opens just a crack, and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The men see this happen and agree it was quite a clever idea; so, after the game, they decide to do the same thing on the re turn trip and save some money. When they get to the station they buy a single ticket for the return trip but see, to their astonishment, that the three women don't buy any ticket at all!!

'How are you going to travel without a ticket?' asks one perplexed man.

'Watch and learn,' answer the women.

When they board the train, the three men cram themselves into a toilet, and the three women cram into a toilet just down the way. Shortly after the train is on its way, one of the women leaves her toilet and walks over to the toilet in which the men are hiding. She knocks on their door and says, 'Ticket please.'

I'm still trying to figure out why men think they are smarter than women.

Thanks, Carol!

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Awards!

My friend Carol over at http://charliandme.blogspot.com/ has bestowed these lovely awards to all who stop by her spot, are on her favorites, or leaves a comment. Thanks Carol!
So, without further ado, I am going to show off my awards from her.

To all the lovely people who stop by, are on my blog roll or leave a comment, I bestow these lovely awards to you!










Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Monday, August 18, 2008

God's Problem Now

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'

(Thanks, Frank!)

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Garfieldism...


This is true in SO many ways! Thanks, Bill!


Saturday, August 16, 2008

I've Got Your Back

I am a small and precious child, my dad's been sent to fight.
The only place I'll see his face, is in my dreams at night.
He will be gone too many days for my young mind to keep track.
I may be sad, but I am proud. My daddy's got your back.

I am a caring mother. My son has gone to war.
My mind is filled with worries that I have never known before.
Everyday I try to keep my thoughts from turning black.
I may be scared, but I am proud. My son has got your back.

I am a strong and loving wife, with a husband soon to go.
There are times I'm terrified in a way most never know.
I bite my lip, and force a smile as I watch my husband pack.
My heart may break, but I am proud. My husband's got your back.

I am a Soldier. Serving Proudly, standing tall.
I fight for freedom, yours and mine by answering this call.
I do my job while knowing, the thanks it sometimes lacks.
Say a prayer that I'll come home. It's me who's got your back.

Thanks, Michele!

Time Gets Better With Age

Enjoy! (Thanks, Bill!)


http://home.att.net/~mcp3_2000/_classics/021/age.htm

Friday, August 15, 2008

The Jigsaw Puzzle

When God opened the box of my life
It was jumbled pieces all around
Looked long and hard at the contents
And smiled at what he found!

Painstakingly he took few pieces
Sought to find its place
All the time I sighed and squirmed
Watched the smile still on his face!

I tried so hard to urge him
Fit each piece; impatiently in vain
So I could see the finished work
He smiled at me again!

Then let me be for periods long
Turned away, left me alone
I pleaded with him to no avail
The silence had to be borne!

God was perfecting me I knew
And perhaps I needed to wait
I learnt although he was never early
My God was never late!

As I learnt the virtue of patience
To place few pieces he d return
The puzzle would one day take form
A lesson I struggled to learn!

But so few pieces he placed
My patience he sorely tried
Nowhere as much as I wanted
How with him could I abide?

So trusting in my intelligence
Rather than wait so long
I tried fitting them on my own
Alas they were always wrong!

I'd struggle to place a piece
Assuming I had it all
Worn from trying so hard
At last I'd let it fall!

Each time I tried it on my own
He'd watch me struggle in vain
With nothing but a smile, then
Lovingly return, fit a piece again!

At last with every piece in place
I sit with awe at his feet
Amazed at the beautiful work
My life over, the puzzle complete!
~ Judy Doyle ~

Thanks, Michele!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Three Things to Ponder

1. Cows
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments

C O W S
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country.

Maybe we should give each of them a cow.

T H E C O N S T I T U T I O N

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years,. and we're not using it anymore.

T H E 1 0 C O M M A N D M E N T S

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this: You cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal,' 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery,' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.

In God we trust!

Thanks, Wanda!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Tagged!

I've been tagged..........

My friend Carol at http://charliandme.blogspot.com/ has invited me to do the following tag....

Here are the rules:

1. Link to the person who "tagged" you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Tag six people at the end of your post.
5. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know your entry is up.

Now let me see.... six random things.... gosh this is tough... I don't like to talk that much about myself....

1. Twenty years ago I went back to school (business college) after being out of school for 20 years and managed to graduate with a 3.88 grade average.

2. After I graduated from business college I found the job of my dreams... not only did I find a job I love, I get paid to do it!

3. I am very close to my sister that lives up north. I love her more than life itself.

4. I listen to Christmas music all year long, but I love all kinds of music.

5. I absolutely LOVE house blogs!

6. I have 4 great-grandchildren.


Well, there you have it. How did I do?

I know I'm supposed to "tag" 6 people. Now let's see... who can I tag? If I have tagged you, and you don't want to be tagged, I will take absolutely NO offense.

Julie (my favorite Irish lass) from http://celticanamcara.blogspot.com/
Handsome Nate over at http://fargo1928.blogspot.com/
A lovely young lady who "does it herself" over at http://diydiva.net/
Miss Kitty (Myrtle Mae's Mom) over at http://educatedandpoor.blogspot.com/
Sandi who posts Maxine over at http://sandimcbride.blogspot.com/
and
Deanne, an AMAZING hoop star over at http://sushizume.com/

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Another Step Back in Time...


I have no idea who put this together, but, it's wonderful! And Oh So True...

Long ago and far away, in a land that time forgot,
Before the days of Dylan, or the dawn of Camelot.
There lived a race of innocents, and they were you and me,
For Ike was in the White House in that land where we were born,
Where navels were for oranges, and Peyton Place was porn.
We learned to gut a muffler, we washed our hair at dawn,
We spread our crinolines to dry in circles on the lawn.
We longed for love and romance, and waited for our Prince,
And Eddie Fisher married Liz, and no one's seen him since.
We danced to 'Little Darlin,' and sang to 'Stagger Lee'
And cried for Buddy Holly in the Land That Made Me, Me.
Only girls wore earrings then, and 3 was one too many,
And only boys wore flat-top cuts, except for Jean McKinney.
We fell for Frankie Avalon, Annette was oh, so nice,
And when they made a movie, they never made it twice.
We didn't have a Star Trek Five, or Psycho Two and Three,
Or Rocky-Rambo Twenty in the Land That Made Me, Me.
Miss Kitty had a heart of gold, and Chester had a limp,
And Reagan was a Democrat whose co-star was a chimp.
We had a Mr. Wizard, but not a Mr. T ,
And Oprah couldn't talk, yet, in the Land That Made Me, Me.
We had our share of heroes, we never thought they'd go,
At least not Bobby Darin, or Marilyn Monroe.
For youth was still eternal, and life was yet to be,
And Elvis was forever in the Land That Made Me, Me.
We'd never seen the rock band that was Grateful to be Dead,
And Airplanes weren't named Jefferson, and Zeppelins were not Led.
And Beatles lived in gardens then, and Monkees lived in trees,
Madonna was a virgin in the Land That Made Me, Me.
We'd never heard of microwaves, or telephones in cars,
And babies might be bottle-fed, but they weren't grown in jars.
We hadn't seen enough of jets to talk about the lag,
And microchips were what was left at the bottom of the bag.
And Hardware was a box of nails, and bytes came from a flea,
And rocket ships were fiction in the Land That Made Me, Me.
Buicks came with portholes, and side shows came with freaks,
And bathing suits came big enough to cover both your cheeks.
And Coke came just in bottles, and skirts below the knee,
And Castro came to power near the Land That Made Me, Me.
We had no Crest with Fluoride, we had no Hill Street Blues,
We had no patterned pantyhose or Lipton herbal tea
Or prime-time ads for condoms in the Land That Made Me, Me.
There were no golden arches, no Perrier to chill,
And fish were not called Wanda, and cats were not called Bill.
And middle-aged was 35 and old was forty-three,
And ancient were our parents in the Land That Made Me, Me.
But all things have a season, or so we've heard them say,
And now instead of Maybelline we swear by Retin-A.
They send us invitations to join AARP,
We've come a long way, baby, from the Land That Made Me, Me.
So now we face a brave new world in slightly larger jeans,
And wonder why they're using smaller print in magazines.
And we tell our children's children of the way it used to be,
Long ago and far away in the Land That Made Me.... Me.
Thanks, Gina!

Monday, August 11, 2008

Is It Me???

Is it just me, or does Google spread that joy around? Today I cannot access my GMail. Arggggggggghhh!!!!!!
This is a good one...


Sunday, August 10, 2008

Memories


For those of you who remember one of the delights of Detroit...
This is my favorite picture of a wonderful thing that once was. A Bob-Lo boat. There was the Columia and the Ste. Claire.
I rode them many times. There were trips to Bob-Lo Island -- a place that had rides, food, and a picnic area (a small amusement park) or (for the adults) you could ride up the river and back on a moonlight cruise that had a band you could dance to.
This picture is a depiction of a moonlight cruise.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

You Make Me Smile


Isn't this the sweetest award you have ever seen? Carol at http://charliandme.blogspot.com/ is passing out this adorable award to everyone on her blog roll as well as anyone who stops by to read her blog. Thank you so much Carol!....

Since Carol was kind enough to pass this award on to me, and suggest that I do the same, I would like to pass this lovely little award on to everyone who stops by to read my blog as well as those already on my favorite list. Like Carol, I feel there isn't a blog I have visited that hasn't made me smile so please feel free to pick up this little cutie for yourself.......
Now there is one tiny little catch..... There is a tag that goes along with the award. The tag is this. Name Five Songs That You Are Embarrassed To Sing......
Well, I've been singing since I was about 4 years old. I have sang all kinds of songs, and I don't think there IS anything that I'm embarrassed to sing! What a quandary... Of course, now that I'm "older" I don't quite sound like I used to in my younger days, so I don't sing in front of too many people anymore!

Out of Commission

Hi to all my friends and family. I will be out of commission for a couple of days. The back went out again. I will pre-schedule one for tomorrow!

Have a great day!!!

Edited: I am feeling somewhat better, so I have stopped in to check my blog! I must admit, it is very hard to stay away!

Friday, August 8, 2008

WALKING AND BEER:

A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles per year.

Another study found Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of beer a year.

That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.

Kind of makes you proud to be an American.

(Thanks, Poppi!)

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Old Love


A husband in his back yard is trying to fly a kite. He throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few seconds, then it comes crashing backdown to earth. He tries this a few more times with no success.

All the while, his wife is watching from the kitchen window, muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything. She opens the window and yells to her husband, 'You need a piece of tail.'
The man turns with a confused look on his face and says, 'Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite!'
(Thanks, Bill!)

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Light

This was too funny not to share....


Important Announcement....

Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas, and oil,
the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

We apologize for the inconvenience.
(Thanks, Linda!)

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

"Kids"

http://www.maniacworld.com/twin-baby-moose-in-sprinkler.html

I sure hope this link works. If not, just copy and paste the path into your browser and enjoy!

Monday, August 4, 2008

Ruth

This is one of my favorites. My sister sent this to me. It's been awhile since I've seen it, and I want to share. Thank you, Sissy!

Ruth went to her mail box and there was only one letter.

She picked it up and looked at it before opening, but then she looked at the envelope again.

There was no stamp, no postmark, only her name and address.

She read the letter:

Dear Ruth:

I`m going to be in your neighborhood Saturday afternoon and I'd like to stop by for a visit.

Love Always,

Jesus


Her hands were shaking as she placed the letter on the table. 'Why would the Lord want to visit me? I'm nobody special. I don't have anything to offer.'

With that thought, Ruth remembered her empty kitchen cabinets.

'Oh my goodness, I really don't have anything to offer. I'll have to run down to the store and buy something for dinner.'

She reached for her purse and counted out its contents. Five dollars and forty cents. 'Well, I can get some bread and cold cuts, at least.' She threw on her coat and hurried out the door.

A loaf of French bread, a half-pound of sliced turkey, and a carton of milk...leaving Ruth with grand total twelve cents to last her until Monday. Nonetheless, she felt good as she headed home, her meager offerings tucked under her arm.

'Hey lady, can you help us, lady?'

Ruth had been so absorbed in her dinner plans, she hadn't even noticed two figures huddled in the alleyway. A man and a woman, both of them dressed in little more than rags.

'Look lady, I ain't got a job, you know, and my wife and I have been living out here on the street, and, well, now it's getting cold and we're getting kinda hungry and, well, if you could help us. Lady, we'd really appreciate it.'

Ruth looked at them both.

They were dirty, they smelled bad and frankly, she was certain that they could get some kind of work if they really wanted to.

'Sir, I'd like to help you, but I'm a poor woman myself. All I have is a few cold cuts and some bread, and I'm having an important guest for dinner tonight and I was planning on serving that to Him.'

'Yeah, well, okay lady, I understand. Thanks anyway.'

The man put his arm around the woman's shoulders, turned and headed back into the alley.

As she watched them leave, Ruth felt a familiar twinge in her heart.

'Sir, wait!'

The couple stopped and turned as she ran down the alley after them.

'Look, why don't you take this food. I'll figure out something else to serve my guest.'

She handed the man her grocery bag.

'Thank you lady. Thank you very much!'

'Yes, thank you!' It was the man's wife, and Ruth could see now that she was shivering.

'You know, I've got another coat at home. Here, why don't you take this one.' Ruth unbuttoned her jacket and slipped it over the woman's shoulders.

Then smiling, she turned and walked back to the street...without her coat and with nothing to serve her guest.

'Thank you lady! Thank you very much!'

Ruth was chilled by the time she reached her front door, and worried too.

The Lord was coming to visit and she didn't have anything to offer Him.

She fumbled through her purse for the door key. But as she did, she noticed another envelope in her mailbox.

'That's odd. The mailman doesn't usually come twice in one day.'

Dear Ruth:

It was so good to see you again. Thank you for the lovely meal. And thank you, too, for the beautiful coat.

Love Always,

Jesus

The air was still cold, but even without her coat, Ruth no longer noticed.

Good things will happen to everyone that touches this story.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

The Price of Gas

A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre.

After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, 'Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings.

'I had no Monet

to buy Degas



to make the Van Gogh.'

See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else.
I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.

(Thanks, Jan!)

Saturday, August 2, 2008

MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep..

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

This coming week is National Mental Health Care week. You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care. Well, my job is done . . . . Your turn.

Thanks to my friend Carol (who is a retired RN) and thought she should contact me! LOL

Friday, August 1, 2008

Golf Lessons

A foursome of guys is waiting at the men's tee, while another foursome of women is hitting from the ladies' tees.

The ladies are taking their time. When the final lady is ready to hit her ball, she hacks it ten feet.
She goes over and whiffs it completely. Then she hacks it another ten feet, and finally hacks it another five feet.

She looks up at the patiently waiting men and says apologetically, 'I guess all those f--king lessons I took over the winter didn't help.

One of the men immediately responds, 'Well, there you have it... you should have taken golf lessons instead!'

He never even had a chance to duck.

(Another gem from Frank!)