RAK

This is how I try to live my life. Hope the link works. It is from Simple Truths.

http://www.powerofkindnessmovie.com/?cm_mmc=CheetahMail-_-FR-_-05.06.2011-_-TPOKmovie&utm_source=CheetahMail&utm_campaign=TPOKmovie

I Don't Know Why.

1. Is it a good thing if a vacuum cleaner really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on a watch called the second hand?

3. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

4. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What the heck is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it is really "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and “wise guy” opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

What?

I just love these photographs of building that have expression!

Observations

Life Observations:

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

21. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

22. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

23. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

24. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

25. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

26. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

27. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

28. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

29. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

Mondays

I think this just about says it all. Don't you?

Why? Why? Why?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they already know there is not enough money?

Why does someone Believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

If people evolved from apes, Why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses Are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE......The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

Gratitudes

My friend, Miss Kitty over at http://educatedandpoor.blogspot.com/ and the Happy Kitten Cottage posted her gratitudes. I liked it so much that I thought it would be nice to kind of start that ripple in the pond and tell some of mine.

I'm grateful for my job (which I not only love but get paid to do it), my hubs, the girls (my kittehs) my family & friends, the friends I have made through all the blogs I read and through mine, my health, freedom, food on the table, clothes on my back, my home, and the right to attend the church of my choice. There are many more, but I have "writer's block" and can't think of them.

Now I will ask you the question she posed: What are you thankful for?

Something Funny

Coffee

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. The conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain-looking, some expensive, and some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.

After all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, THAT is the source of your problems and stress."

"Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In most cases, it's just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups and then began eyeing each other's cups."

"Now consider this: Life is the coffee. . . and the jobs, houses, cars, things, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life, and the type of cup we have does not define nor change the quality of life we live. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us. God brews the coffee, not the cups."

"Enjoy your coffee."

"Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect; it means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections."

Live in peace and peace will live in you. God is the source.

Counseling North Dakota Style...

Ole and Sven are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, chewing and drinking beer when suddenly Sven says, "I think I'm gonna divorce my wife - she ain't spoke to me in over 2 months."

Ole spits, sips his beer and says, "Better think it over; women like that are hard to find."

(Thanks, Carol!)

How to Dance in the Rain

From my friend, Firefighter Bill.

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 a.m.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease. As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, 'She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is.' I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, 'That is the kind of love I want in my life.'

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be. With all the jokes and fun that are in e-mails, sometimes there is one that comes along that has an important message. This one I thought I could share with you.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have. I hope you share this with someone you care about. I just did.

'Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain.'

Something Interesting

This is pretty interesting! Enjoy!! (Thanks, Wanda.) I like what it tells you about yourself.

Click here: Memoriter (http://memoriter.net/flash/test.html)

Christian One Liners

1. Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
2. Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.
3. Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
4. It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
5. The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
6. When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.
7. People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
8. Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.
9. Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
10. If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
11. God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
12. Some minds are like concrete thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
13. Peace starts with a smile.
14. I don't know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?
15. A lot of church members who are singing 'Standing on the Promises' are just sitting on the premises.
16. We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
17. Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them.
18. Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
19. Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
20. Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
21. Forbidden fruits create many jams.
22. God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
23. God grades on the cross, not the curve.
24. God loves everyone, but probably prefers 'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts!'
25. God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
26. He who angers you, controls you!
27. If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!
28. Prayer: Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty!
29. The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
30. The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
31. We don't change the message, the message changes us.
32. You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.
33. The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

Thanks, Carol!

Tips For a Better Life

Thanks, Sissy!

TIPS FOR A BETTER LIFE IN 2008

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Buy a lock if you have to.
3. Buy a DVR and tape your late night shows and get more sleep.
4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to __________ today.'
5. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
6. Play more games and read more books than you did in 2007.
7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, tai chi, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Clear clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life.
14. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
15 Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
16. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away.
18 Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'
26. Forgive everyone for everything.
27. What other people think of you is none of your business.
28. God heals almost everything.
29. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
30. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
31. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
32. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
33. The best is yet to come.
34 No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
35. Do the right thing!
36. Call your family often. (Or email them to death!!!) Hey, I'm thinking of ya!
37. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am thankful for __________. Today I accomplished _________.
38. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
39. Enjoy the ride. Remember this is not Disney World and you certainly don't want a fast pass. You only have one ride through life so make the most of it and enjoy the ride.
40. Please forward this to everyone you care about.

May your troubles be less,
May your blessings be more,
May nothing but happiness come through your door! :)

Gas vs Printer Ink

The price of Gas versus Printer Ink

All these examples do NOT imply that gasoline is cheap; it just illustrates how outrageous some prices are.... You will be really shocked by the last one! (At least, I was...)

Compared with Gasoline......

Think a gallon of gas is expensive? This makes one think, and also puts things in perspective to other things we buy.

Diet Snapple 16 oz $1.29 ... $10.32 per gallon
Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz $1.19 ..........$9.52 per gallon
Gatorade 20 oz $1.59 ..... $10.17 per gallon
Ocean Spray 16 oz $1.25 ......... $10.00 per gallon
Brake Fluid 12 oz $3.15 ...... $33.60 per gallon
Vick's Nyquil 6 oz $8.35 ... $178.13 per gallon
Pepto Bismol 4 oz $3.85 .. $123.20 per gallon
Whiteout 7 oz $1.39 ....... . $25.42 per gallon
Scope 1.5 oz $0.99 .....$84.48 per gallon

And this is the REAL KICKER...

Evian water 9 oz $1.49..$21.19 per gallon! $21.19 for WATER and the buyers don't even know the source (Evian spelled backwards is Naive).

Ever wonder why printers are so cheap? So they have you hooked for the ink. Someone calculated the cost of the ink at............... (you won't believe it....but it is true........) $5,200 a gallon (five thousand two hundred dollars)!

So, the next time you're at the pump,be glad your car doesn't run on water, Scope, or Whiteout, Pepto Bismol, Nyquil or God forbid, Printer Ink!

Just a little humor to help ease the pain of your next trip to the pump...

The Interview With God...

This is awesome! Enjoy!

http://www.theinterviewwithgod.com/popup-frame.html

God's Pharmacy

A sliced carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and radiating lines look just like the human eye ... and YES science now shows that carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes.

A Tomato has four chambers and is red. The heart is red and has four chambers. All of the research shows tomatoes are indeed pure heart and blood food.

Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows that grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalizing food.

A Walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere, upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds are on the nut just like the neo-cortex. We now know that walnuts help develop over 3 dozen neuron-transmitters for brain function.

Kidney Beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and yes, they look exactly like the human kidneys.

Celery, Bok Choy, Rhubarb and more look just like bones. These foods specifically target bone strength. Bones are 23% sodium and these foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet the body pulls it from the bones, making them weak. These foods replenish skeletal needs of the body.

Eggplant, Avocados and Pears target the health and function of the womb and cervix of the female - they look just like these organs. Today's research shows that when a woman eats 1 avocado a week, it balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight and prevents cervical cancers. And how profound is this? .... It takes exactly 9 months to grow an avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000 photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of these foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of them).

Figs are full of seeds and hang in twos when they grow. Figs increase the motility of male sperm and increase the numbers of sperm as well to overcome male sterility.

Sweet Potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the glycemic index of diabetics.

Olives assist the health and function of the ovaries.

Grapefruits, oranges and other citrus fruits look just like the mammary glands of the female and actually assist the health of the breasts and the movement of lymph in and out of the breasts.

Onions look like body cells. Today's research shows that onions help clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes.

Thanks, Carol!

The Cherokee Legend

Thanks to my friend Frank from up north for this one.

The Cherokee Indian Legend :

Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youth's rite of passage?

His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone.

He is required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to anyone. Once he survives the night, he is a MAN.

He cannot tell the other boys of this experience because each lad must come into manhood on his own.

The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even some human might do him harm. The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could become a man!

Finally, after a horrific night, the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm.

We, too, are never alone. Even when we don't know it, our Heavenly Father is watching over us, sitting on the stump beside us. When trouble comes, all we have to do is reach out to Him.

If you liked this story, pass it on. If not, perhaps you took off your blindfold before dawn.

MORAL OF THIS STORY:
Just because you can't see God, doesn't mean He is not there - 'For we walk by faith, not by sight.' --2 Corinthians 5:7

Estate Planning

From Larry. :-)

Ken was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune.

One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inherit 20 million dollars."

Impressed, the woman obtained his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much better at estate planning than men.

Shhhh.... I think spring is finally here!

How do I know this? Well, MY robin is back! How do I know it is MY robin? Well, for 3 years running this robin sits in my snowball bush (which is right up close and personal with my bedroom window) and flies into the window. Not just once, not just twice, but he does it until I come to the window and move the curtain. I have tried putting window clings on the inside of the window -- doesn't work. I have tried putting bright orange HUGE pumpkin window clings on the OUTSIDE of the entire window -- doesn't work.

The poor thing. I have yet to figure out why he thinks he can sit in the window glass. With huge orange window clings all over it. I have tried everything I can think of to keep him from knocking his brains out year after year, but nothing works. He does eventually stop. But it takes awhile.